Discussion Guide: What Are You Looking For?
Desired Takeaway
Jesus meets us with an invitation, not a demand—and what begins as His invitation to us becomes our invitation to others. We learn to rest in His welcome and extend that same gracious “come and see” posture to the people in our lives.
Icebreaker
Lean In
Look Down
Read John 4L1-26 together.
Look Out
Look In
Jesus’ question isn’t casual. It’s about the direction of your life—your deepest longing.
Live It Out
In John 1:40–46, the invitation spreads. Andrew brings Simon. Philip invites Nathanael. No debates. Just: “Come and see.”
Optional Exercises for the Week
1. Practice the Question Ask one person this week, “What are you hoping for in life right now?” Listen without correcting, fixing, or steering the conversation.
2. Abide Daily Spend 10 minutes each day simply being with Jesus—no agenda. Sit quietly with the words, “Come and see.” Notice what rises in your heart.
3. Practice Humble Honesty If a spiritual conversation comes up and you don’t know the answer, practice saying, “I’m not sure.” Notice what that does in the relationship.
Prayer Prompt
Close by thanking Jesus that He meets us with invitation, not demand. Ask Him to reveal the true longings of your heart. Pray for one person by name who may need a gentle invitation. Invite the Holy Spirit to form in you a posture of grace, humility, and courage.
Jesus meets us with an invitation, not a demand—and what begins as His invitation to us becomes our invitation to others. We learn to rest in His welcome and extend that same gracious “come and see” posture to the people in our lives.
Icebreaker
- If you could ask Jesus one honest question about your life right now, what would it be?
Lean In
- Jesus’ first recorded words in John’s Gospel are a question: “What are you looking for?”
- When you hear that question personally, what feelings come up—curiosity, pressure, hope, discomfort? Why?
Look Down
Read John 4L1-26 together.
- What does Jesus reveal about her deeper thirst?
- How does He balance truth and grace?
- What does this teach us about spiritual conversations?
Look Out
- In our current cultural moment—where conversations about faith can feel polarized or tense—what difference does it make that Jesus starts with a question rather than a lecture or argument?
- Where do you see people around you genuinely searching for something deeper?
- Why might invitation be more powerful than argument in those spaces?
Look In
Jesus’ question isn’t casual. It’s about the direction of your life—your deepest longing.
- Beneath surface-level goals (comfort, success, stability), what do you sense your heart is truly longing for in this season?
- Where might you be trying to perform for Jesus instead of simply abiding with Him?
- What would it look like for you to “come and see” again—to rest, not strive?
- Sit with this personally. There’s no pressure to have the “right” answer—just honesty.
Live It Out
In John 1:40–46, the invitation spreads. Andrew brings Simon. Philip invites Nathanael. No debates. Just: “Come and see.”
- Who in your life might need an invitation rather than an explanation?
- What would change if Christians became known more for humble curiosity and honest presence than polished answers?
- Imagine a community shaped by grace-filled invitation instead of pressure. What would that look like in your workplace, neighborhood, or family?
Optional Exercises for the Week
1. Practice the Question Ask one person this week, “What are you hoping for in life right now?” Listen without correcting, fixing, or steering the conversation.
2. Abide Daily Spend 10 minutes each day simply being with Jesus—no agenda. Sit quietly with the words, “Come and see.” Notice what rises in your heart.
3. Practice Humble Honesty If a spiritual conversation comes up and you don’t know the answer, practice saying, “I’m not sure.” Notice what that does in the relationship.
Prayer Prompt
Close by thanking Jesus that He meets us with invitation, not demand. Ask Him to reveal the true longings of your heart. Pray for one person by name who may need a gentle invitation. Invite the Holy Spirit to form in you a posture of grace, humility, and courage.